Lost: One Mind.

Last seen within the body of a drunken college-educated boy very early Sunday morning, right before said body's mouth bit into a block of uncooked Ramen noodles. Chicken dust packet was opened and slightly wet, though dust was nowhere to be found.

Rewards upon return: One healthy aversion towards Ramen noodles, inordinate-though-appropriate amount of shame, one lesson for now, and one story for much, much later.

-Richard Kniazuk